Advice To Your Younger Self

Seeking advice from your younger self is more feasible than you think; however, the challenge is knowing what to look for during that time of reflection. As a therapist and as a client, I know first-hand how difficult it is to find out why you are the way you are. Believe it or not, finding the source or cause of any behavior had its beginning, but you never took the time to examine the why fully. Unfortunately, this examination never occurs in many cases because not many people think to perform that assessment to know something is wrong. Instead, the blame game is standard because very few people want to admit a false and indeed remove themselves from ever being flawed; instead, we want to blame anybody, anywhere, for our indiscretion.

As I mentioned in the beginning paragraph of being a client, that description was no mistake. I’ve been in therapy for ten years, dealing with my demons due to the war in Vietnam and fighting as a combat Marine. When I was discharged and returned home, I knew that I wasn’t the same person deep inside. I knew something was wrong, but I didn’t know how to handle it. I kept those demons buried deep inside for years, but they never left me because I wasn’t doing the work. To call upon my younger self would have given me the answer, but being unaware of outside help wasn’t an opportunity at my disposal, so I suffered quietly. During those 50 plus years, I did keep busy working on my career, but I didn’t work on myself. To clear my head, to not blame myself, could have been the answer needed to move me along, but guess what happened? Other unsightly emotions cropped up as I sank deeper into an emotional abyss.

To live your life over, to have a second chance, or to have the ability to see the future, how would that experience be? As I extract one example, having a second chance is more compelling because it subscribes to figuring out your mistakes and not repeating those mistakes. Ask yourself, “what did I do before that I can now do better? Yes, a second chance to change your journey’s path is possible, providing the lessons learned along the way are practiced by admission, your admission! So let’s be clear. You are doing better means making better decisions. It’s looking at what was done and then accessing your ability to learn from your mistakes. We all know that life is difficult, but if you contribute to that difficulty, what you get, you deserve and perish the thought of you not caring because you have convinced yourself of your comfort.